the 4th star

Emmanuelle Chrique.
Her last name is pronounced ‘Shreeky.’
Bet you a Coke Shreeky’s friends call her ‘Manny.’
Manny Shreeky.
Fascinating.

“We’re fortunate that we have someone like (Troy) Westwood who unceremoniously was disbarred from this organization last year. That isn’t how we want to treat Winnipeg Blue Bombers and Troy is a hall-of-fame type player here in my humble eyes. For him to be more or less be discarded the way he was… I don’t want players who are long-time Bombers to think that’s the kind of fate they face in some point. He should have left this club with a little more dignity than what he left it with last year.”
— Winnipeg Blue Bombers head coach Mike Kelly, speaking to reporters about bringing Troy Westwood back to the organization Monday.

So, do you go with the idea that Westwood got cut because he lost the training camp battle to the current field goal kicker and that is nothing like being “unceremoniously disbarred” from an organization? Or do you look towards Kevin Glenn and how he was cut by Kelly and the Bombers? That one sentence press release to announce the decision certainly didn’t hold much ceremony to it. Or dignity, for that matter. On that subject, don’t you think Lyle Bauer would have had something to do with the ‘lack of dignity’ when Westwood was let go before last season? That could be a way to go, too. Or maybe you explore the angle that Kelly, who cancelled the phone calls to his radio call-in show earlier this year because he couldn’t take the criticism, sure likes to take shots at the previous regime. The contradiction angle has been bent every which way, though.

Perhaps the story here is that a 42-year-old punter is just a distraction (and a much needed ticket boost) from the real story — the fact the Bombers lost the biggest game of the season and are now faced with back-to-back contests against the powerhouse Montreal Alouettes. With that scene set as the back drop, here’s my favourite plot line: By bringing Westwood back, the Bombers are officially out of gate attractions. They can’t win, and even when they do string victories together Kelly has alienated the fan base to such a degree that people are still staying away. Forget about rebuilding the roster — it’s now a recovery mission OFF the field. Casual fans use the club as a punchline* and season ticket holders might not be so quick to renew this winter. Does anyone have Tom Canada’s number in Costa Rica?

*What is Mike Kelly’s favourite month? Answer: March — in like a lion, out like a lamb.

photo

First Down
The difference is so glaring that you almost have to shield your eyes and turn your head. On one sideline, Buck Pierce. He’s a gamer, no question, but when he was having his shoulder worked on by team doctors you knew the B.C. Lions were forced to go to the bullpen. Travis Lulay — essentially the Lions third string quarterback if you count the injured Jarious Jackson on the depth chart — comes in and not only leads the Lions to an important victory, he looks capable and confident while doing it. On the other sideline was Damon Allen Michael Bishop, the on-again, off-again quarterback of the Winnipeg Blue Bombers who struggled to complete just 13 passes in 30-plus attempts late yesterday afternoon. The three picks and the fumble? Just another day at the office — if you work at Dunder-Mifflin. Despite the struggles, no one expects Winnipeg to turn somewhere else. After the game, Bomber receiver Terrance Edwards tells to Bob Irving that Bishop is dealing with some “lower-body issues” and that could provide reason for his errant aim. So what does all this say about the Blue Bombers Young Quarterback Development program? Well, not only are other teams getting it done with their pivot depth (it’s an embarrassment of riches over on the B.C. side), the fact that head coach Mike Kelly — the keeper of the quarterbacks — would rather watch a guy who may be playing with an injury struggle to string two passes together than turn to another look under centre speaks volumes about the gains the club has made in addressing the most important position on the field. Can you say incomplete?

Second Down
Linebacker Joe Lobendahn has turned into a fan (and coach’s) favourite with his energy on the field. That energy usually leads to injuries with Joe, though, and his status each week seems to garner some copy. His injury-history is a long story, so no one should have been surprised when he pulled up lame in the third quarter after re-aggrivating a hamstring injury. That was it for his night, but he was labouring well before that. Let the record show that Barrin Simpson, not the same piston as Motor Joe but a healthy body in the same position, was a healthy scratch. In another head-scratching move, Coach Kelly dressed someone named Titus Ryan yesterday. Ryan saw very limited action (if you count going for a Gatorade as action). Instead of dressing a guy who didn’t play, why didn’t Kelly dress Simpson as a back-up in case Lobendahn — who everyone knows has a hard time staying on the field — shows signs of slowing and needs to be spelled? Great question. I’d love to give you an answer but seeing how it’s second down, I have to run.

Third Down
Punt. Serna can do both kicking jobs, right?

—-

UPDATE: Maybe this will sell some tickets.

”I don’t know that we ever hit him,” Giants head coach Tom Coughlin said of (New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees, who had completed 23 of 30 passes for 369 yards and four scores. ”At this level, if you’re going to stop the pass, you’ve got to get pressure. You’ve got to force the quarterback not to throw it on his tempo.”

Clockwise from left: Crushed, smoked, beat down, and throttled. I probably could have included clocked, annihilated, disassembled, punched-out, blasted, exploded, knee to the groin, destroyed, killed, murdered (same as killed), squashed, hammered, small packaged, routed, flamed, dumped on, busted up, and  smashed. This is what it feels like to lose. Me no like.

1. As amazing as this sounds, FOX has managed to find a play-by-play man worse than Joe Buck. The one time the local puts the sound of the Giants game on for me, and I wanted them to hit the mute button before the first quarter was up. With all his hyperbole and guesses of what is actually happening on the field, Thom Brennaman has no business owning a television letting alone being in the booth.

2. Ed Hochuli and his crew were ‘Brennaman-like’ today. Make that ‘Giant-like.’ Yeesh. Oh well. At least the Eagles and Redskins lost, too — TO THE RAIDERS AND CHIEFS! Saved the day, that’s for sure. They say good teams do not lose two in a row. I guess we’ll find out what the Giants are when the Cardinals stop by Sunday night.

A nice piece here on Manny Matsakis — the man who essentially saved the Winnipeg Blue Bombers season — got me thinking about the future and who might be playing quarterback for the Blue and Gold next year. Let’s take a look at the candidates and their chances for starter’s reps in 2010:

Damon Allen Michael Bishop
Age: 33
The former Kansas State star has a big body and a cannon for an arm. Also working in Bishop’s favour is the fact that he has some actual CFL experience — a rare commodity on the Bombers QB depth chart. He’s somewhat mobile — though seems reluctant to tuck the ball and go — and seems tough enough to stand in there and take the hits. Working against him isn’t his propensity for interceptions and making the bad decision, but his age. He’ll be 34-years-old if he makes it to camp next season, and for a club that told everyone this season was about developing a young quarterback, one has to wonder if he’ll be in the plans. If you listen to what the club says, Bishop gives them the best chance to win right now. What about next year? And the year after that? Tough to develop quarterbacks if they never get into any games. Realistically, Bishop would have to win the Grey Cup to have a chance to be named the 2010 starter. Not sure if that’s in the cards this fall. Ideally, Bishop would be invited back as the back-up, working in and out of games with another, younger guy. Like the Hamilton situation.
Probability of being the 2010 starter: 50 percent, a number based strictly on his age and the idea that the club wants to develop the position. (ed note — how’s that going by the way?)

Casey Bramlet
Age: 28
Joined the team at the start of the mid-season quarterback collection drive and has seen some limited action. The guy is huge (6-foot-4, 220-pounds) and has a pretty good arm. His happy feet looked to be a problem in his game action, but that might be a case of jitters more than anything else. Not sure how he fits in to the club’s plans, but he’s officially listed as the back-up quarterback right now, and that’s got to account for something.
Probability of being the 2010 starter: 25 percent. Doubtful that the Bombers would hand over the keys to another guy who has limited CFL experience after what happened earlier this year.

Ricky Santos
Age: 25
A little smaller but a little quicker than the other two quarterbacks on the active roster, Santos came to Winnipeg from Montreal — where he was buried deep in the QB depth chart. He falls right in the Bramlet category, where we haven’t seen what he can do and until that happens, no real assessment can be made. Not to beat a dead horse, but what’s the point of stating your intention of developing a young guy, bringing in a bunch of young guys, and not taking them out of the wrapper?
Probability of being the 2010 starter: 10 percent at best.

Adam DiMichele
Age: 24
Is this guy still in Winnipeg?
Probability of being the 2010 starter: Zero percent.

Stefan LeFors
Age: 28
Ah, Stef. What a terrible situation head coach Mike Kelly put you in. A third-stringer in Edmonton, he was named the Bomber starter early in camp and after splitting the first two games his play dropped off significantly. Was it because of Kelly’s offence? Maybe. LeFors got hurt, was asked to take a pay cut or a bus ticket, and is out for the season. The way he was treated, the situation he was put into by his head coach, one has to wonder if he’ll be back next year. Kelly has shown a softer side after letting Matsakis run the offence, so I would guess the club might want him back again. LeFors Version 2.0. The question is: Will the weak-armed lefty want to come back?
Probability of being the 2010 starter: 75 percent. I have a funny feeling LeFors will be the starter when the curtain drops on the 2010 season. Unless Bishop wins the Grey Cup this year…chuckle.

Someone Else
Age: Yes
You have to wonder is there’s a chance the Bombers will go elsewhere for their quarterback next year. There seems to be a good chance Kerry Joseph (and maybe Cody Pickett) will be available, and who knows what will happen with the B.C. situation. Mr. Jackson or Mr. Pierce could get sick of the split time on the coast. Or maybe there’s a fourth-stringer in the Saskatchewan system that Kelly thinks will be a star in this league. This is the CFL, people — anything can happen! Groan.
Probability of being the 2010 starter: 30 percent. Because you never know.

Paul Blake
Age: “I hope he gets younger as he gets closer.”
His father’s death behind him, Blake is prime for a chance to show he could lead a team to the next level before he tears his rotator cuff throwing balls through a tire swing. Sinbad might not be there to help with the rigours of Coach Kelly’s playbook, though, and who knows if Dean Elias will allow an older QB to play next year. If Bishop doesn’t get the chance, then why would another aging pivot? Ed Gennero would probably have to come in as a consultant to help with the transition. Lot’s of reasons not to include Blake, but at least Kathy Ireland would see some shower time.
Probability of being the 2010 starter: Zero percent
Probability of hilarity: 100 percent.

Those degenerate B.C. Lions (7-7) vs. Winnipeg Blue Bombers (6-8)
The Squared Circle at Polo Park
Sunday, four o’clock, two out of three falls

1. Two-time Super Bowl champion Ben Rothlisberger is down with D-X, so why isn’t Doug Brown?
Some background: The last time these two clubs met, the Birthday Boy (wasn’t that a party?) did not like the way some members of the Lions *performed* in front of the Bombers bench prior to the game. Hated it so much, he did, that he decided to spare Freep readers his experiences as a Safeway club card member for a piece detailing his outrage at what he saw that fateful day. How could football players do something so outrageous? What an embarrassment to the league. Moral high ground here…moral high ground there…

Which brings us to today: Turns out some members of the Lions called Brown a “cry-baby” for his take in the paper. The guys name is Rick Foley. For the purposes of this wrestling-heavy post, let’s just call him Mick Foley and leave it there. Rather than taking the moral high ground and being the bigger man he tells us he is, Brown decides to cue the entrance music and maybe create a little media attention in the process.

“I got past it….”

Let me stop you right there. Read those words again. Everyone clear? Good. Hmmm, I sense a ‘but’ coming. Two hundred and two words later, Brown finishes telling Ed Tait how he got past it, voicing his outrage and astonishment on how people can be so stupid. Of course, Brown is no idiot. He saves the best lines for last:

You don’t poke a dog behind a fence with a stick. If they want to keep talking about it then we can carry it over. It’s too bad Foley plays defensive end if he’s got something to say about this.

“YOU KNOCK ME DOWN, I’LL BITE YOUR ANKLES!!”

Oh wait. That was from a different NFL historian on the Blue and Gold. Never mind.

2. Are the lines a little blurred here?
Let’s go back to the days of Milt Stegall for a second. I seem to remember a bunch of Blue Bombers’ receivers getting together after a touchdown score, dancing around or performing little skits in celebration. Or defensive players finding that extra gear of enthusiasm after they make a pick or a big tackle for a loss. Getting fired up before the game — AT HOME — is any different? I guess the problem Brown has with it is the disrespect. See, it’s not like jumping around after a sack. That pays some homage to the opponent. You’re honouring the player with your over the top celebration. Oh, wait. Taunting is OK. This player code thing is so confusing. What about a head coach insulting fans? What colour is that on the moral Twister mat? As for being an embarrassment to the CFL, that’s a stretch at best. This is the same league that has a history of bringing in American players with checkered pasts and the same league that once used the marketing campaign of “Our Balls are Bigger.” This is also the same loop that once had two out of the nine teams sporting the same nickname and the same loop which allows players to miss games so they can pursue other employment opportunities. Embarrassing means different things to different people, I guess.

3. Is Paris Jackson my new favourite player?
Yes. Oh, you didn’t know?

(is that D-X’s music, you know, the start of it? I have no idea…)

—–

UPDATE: Let me remove the sarcastic hat and look at this objectively. Are the Lions morons for emulating the actions of a pro wrestling tag-team? Absolutely. But energizing themselves and the home crowd is barely a slap in the face let alone a sign of disrespect to an opposing team. Disrespect would be taking a dump in a helmet with your logo on it. If what the Lions did is a sign of disrespect, then where does a sack dance fall into the equation? Is it OK for a player to gyrate over a player after he just popped him in the open field? Where do you place respect there? As for Ike Charlton’s comments about taunting being ‘whatever’ and what the Lions did being unacceptable, someone really needs to explain to me how the two differ. Taunting is everywhere these days. Every single sport. Maybe this code of conduct that players conveniently refer to when they feel someone has slighted them needs to be clearly defined. Dance around before the game — you just don’t do that. Is Ray Lewis disrespectful when he shakes his thing before taking the field? People have imitated him, mocking him along the way, but I haven’t heard one player say it was disrespectful. Is there some higher standard of honour in professional sport that separates players from society? I doubt it. I wonder if this would be an issue if Winnipeg had lost that game in BC. It appears the code of convenience fits perfectly in this situation. What about others, though? Barrin Simpson quit on the team. Where does that fall under the code? Michael Bishop appears to trash-talk everyone after completing two passes in a row. Where does that fall under the code? Brown gives some sort of tough-guy payback against the Lions in the newspaper? Where does that fall under the code?

We now join the Satellite Hot Stove, already in progress…

Ron MacLean: ….sounds like things are moving in the right direction there. OK. Al. The Quebec City situation.

Al Strachan: Well, it’s no secret that politicians in Quebec want to bring an NHL franchise back there —

Mike Milbury: Wait a second. Hold it right there, Al. Are you siding with the small group of union troublemakers on this?

Strachan: Uh…what are you talking about? We’re not talking about the union here. That was last week. And the week before that. You know, you’re really starting to piss me off, Mike. I’m sick of you hi-jacking this segment all the time.

Glenn Healy: Me too!

Milbury: I’m not hi-jacking (expletive deleted thanks to Cherry’s delay). Typical anti-player guys. Pathetic. Better watch yourselves, I’m taking off my shoe —

MacLean: Now I don’t think we need to go there, Mike. I mean, this is an open…

Milbury: Shut up, Ron. This doesn’t concern you. And get your hand back on your side of the table!! Goddammit. What gender are you, anyway? Now where was I? Ah yes, so Al and Glenn don’t like the way I handle myself on this segment. What are you going to do about it, Al?

Strachan: I’ll tell you what I won’t do. Olli Jokinen and Roberto Luongo for Mark Parrish and Oleg Kvasha.

Milbury: What? Have you lost your mind, old man?

Strachan: Olli Jokinen and Roberto Luongo for Mark Parrish and Oleg Kvasha. Yeah, that one set the Islanders back a decade or so.

Milbury: Oh, I see what you’re doing. Bringing up my general manager past to undermine what I have to say in the present. Clever. Real funny. That’s not going to work for too long, genius. I made a lot of smart deals when I was a GM in this league, buddy —

Healy: Like Bryan McCabe and Todd Bertuzzi for Trevor Linden?

MacLean: Glen has a point there, Mike.

Strachan: Here’s one of my favourites. Zdeno Chara, Bill Muckalt and first round pick which turned out to be Jason Spezza for Alexei Yashin. Good thing you locked him up there, eh?

Healy: And let’s not forget about that Rick Dipietro pick. First overall, ahead of Marian Gaborik and Dany Heatley — both proven 40 goal scorers. How’s that look on the ‘ol resume, Mike? Probably why you’re sitting here and not in the owner’s box…

Milbury:

Mad Mike removes his microphone pack and beats himself with it.

Ask my friends and they’ll tell you the one thing I hate most about my face is the size of my pumpkin head. Extra large on humid days. While that is true — and the costume-clad, candy-filled kids can be so cruel this time of season — the subject is my face and not the entire melon. And no, it’s not the size of my mouth. Big, but not the big problem. Behold crows feet. Foot of crow. Black crows. As you can see, they make a fresh young face older than Favre and Chelios put together. I told her she was too close, that things would be blurry and the grey would show in my beard, but she didn’t listen and took the snapper anyway. My appearance of age doesn’t factor in authority. No one cares.

Man Sandwich = Twice as Hard.

Coming up later today I’ll have some advice for Al Strachan and the three big questions heading into the big Blue Bombers game. In case you haven’t heard, plenty of good seats available. I was going to have an NDP convention prediction, too — seeing how Manitoba will have a new premier by the end of the day — but it turns out I’m actually working it now. Huh. So no time for that. Oh yeah. I forgot to include the television distribution maps in the NFL picks this week, so here those are. Two great games at noon. Maybe I’ll take a picture of the picture in picture. Word up, orange bananas.

This is amazing: The three actors who played the main characters — James Dean (Jim), Natalie Wood (Judy), and Sal Mineo (Plato) all experienced (relatively) young and tragic deaths. Dean, 24, was killed in a car accident. Mineo, 37, was stabbed to death in an alley outside his apartment in West Hollywood. Wood, 43, drowned after *falling* off a boat in 1981.

And there you have it. The most depressing movie ever.

Upon further review, I probably should have went with this video. Rebel Without Balls.

Somehow, a newsroom discussion on the death of Captain Lou, his actual relation to Cindi Lauper, girls having fun, The Goonies, and how old everyone is led to the above this afternoon. Rowdy Roddy Piper. How did this guy become famous? Talk about making something out of nothing. It’s been a while since I saw that clip, but it is still great. I’m not sure how this relates, but earlier in the day the Adult Male Champion emailed to say that Nick Bockwinkle is still alive. Even though no one really suspected otherwise. Everyone is wrestling with past demons, it seems.