the 4th star

There are three things I hope to accomplish while walking around from dive bar to dive bar in Austin, Texas this week. Before I get into it, let it be known that I’m not big on planning out a schedule of where to be at and at what time when it comes to things like music festivals. That doesn’t do it for me. So when I come back from South By Southwest and you ask me how many different bands I saw and what I liked, let me just answer that right now: I don’t know. Maybe. Can’t remember.

The three things:

1. Apparently there is free beer everywhere during the week. Naturally, I’m going to try to have a beer in my hand the entire stay in Texas. That’s right. From the time I arrive at the hotel to the time I’m in the cab headed back to the airport, I will attempt to be properly refreshed with some kind of beer. Now if I’m at a dinner, then the beer can sit next to the plate of fish tacos. If I’m in bed, then the beer can be on the night table. Other than that, I will try to hold onto a bottle or can the rest of the time.

Walking on the street with a beer. At a venue with a beer. Enjoying a bar-be-que with a beer. Watching a band with a beer. Relaxing in the sun with a beer. Running along the river with a beer. Going to the washroom with a beer. Mocking the hipster douchebags with a beer. Drinking a Coke in one hand…with a beer in the other. I’m setting the over/under at 36 hours before I get sick of this and move onto something else.

2. This one is a must. Check out The Hold Steady. Rumour has it Metallica is playing. That would be funny for nostalgic reasons, but I only have one music mission for SXSW and that’s to see The Hold Steady. Me and the thousands of other over-age, college-looking, too scared to talk to women dudes in Austin. Not sure where or when it’s going to happen, but I have designs on the Rachel Ray party they’re playing at.

Yes, that Rachel Ray.

3. Watch the NCAA tournament. Obviously, I will miss a good chunk of the opening weekend but if I can sneak away for one game (and one game is all I’m slotting myself for) it will be the East bracket match-up featuring the No. 10 Minnesota Golden Gophers taking on the No. 7 Texas Longhorns Thursday at 6 o’clock. Texas wins and they play on Saturday, so that could come into play for yours truly, as well.

The ‘Horns are based in Austin, so I imagine there will be a little non-music buzz in the bars that day. Good. I can cheer for Minnesota and jaw with the locals. With a beer in my hand, of course. Hmmm…I don’t have any Golden Gophers gear. Maybe I can swing by Garden City prior to departure for a Fighting Gophers hoodie.

“He loved the Golden Gophers but he hated all the drawn out winters.” (Stuck Between Stations, The Hold Steady)